Job's Christian friends

And when all these things had happened to him, Job's Christian friends came by to comfort him.

The first said, "I'll be praying for you. Seeya." *smile and a wave*

The second said, "You need to stop thinking negative thoughts and start thinking positive thoughts and God will bless you more."

Job responded, "I was thinking..."

But he was cut off when the third said, "You're not very much fun to be with anymore. How come you don't talk more? Would it hurt you to smile more? Being friends with you is hard, so I'm going to leave you here to lay in your own filth so I can go dance in fields of pretty flowers..."

"But I..."

The fourth interrupted, "This wouldn't have happened if you had loved God enough and worshiped Him just like I do. Quite frankly, I'm concerned about your salvation."

After all these had spoken and spoken and spoken, Job responded, "Screw you, you don't know me, get out! If I didn't love God more than anything, and if I wasn't too depressed to have the strength, I'd kill you all where you stand!

And Job cried to God in his sorrow, "Is it not enough that you have taken my wife, my family, my wealth, and my health? Yet I have honored you in all of this. Why have you sent this cruel plague to mock me? It is more than a man can take!"